Went to a BAFTA Games event tonight that was good, informative and amusing. And then afterwards I just kind of bailed. I went alone and sometimes that would be fine, but I just wasn’t feeling like awkwardly shoehorning myself into other people’s conversations. Thinking about it on the way back, I feel that part of it might be because I feel insecure about my current professional situation.
I have spent the last few years half-explaining my job (it’s difficult to actually explain it to most people, even people I share an office with) and always describing it as boring, not something I want to do etc. It’s a negative mental state to be in and one I’m going to move away from. Even if I end up not working, it’s going to be better for me (in some regards) than where I am currently. Hopefully it will result in me having more confidence about myself.